Well, we had a nice little “psych” from Spring yesterday, didn’t we? I had a funny response to it. As thrilled as I was to go outside without socks or a coat on, I thought to myself, “wow, I haven’t even made a couple of those soup recipes yet and it’s already getting warm!” Not that I was complaining…I just have to admit that thought ran through my mind. The sunshine was good for my soul, and then of course it was pretty much a normal blustery winter again today. It has been a very, um, interesting month and a half since Christmas. It feels like a year and a half since Christmas to me. Everyone in my family has been sick twice, and I’ve been the healthiest one of all as opposed to several winters past. Yay for good nutrition, supplements, and getting as much rest as humanly (and motherly) possible.
I have missed writing, blogging, etc, but at the same time it has sort of been nice to not have a computer and not feel responsible to do the things one does when they have a computer at their constant disposal (that can’t be the right word…disposal? That makes no sense. I don’t know.) Anyway, I have felt more focused at times without Facebook and blogging available to me; yet it is a balance, an important balance, because all work and no play makes Jack’s wife a dull girl.
My mind has been on a lot of things in the past 2 months while I haven’t been sharing much out loud. I am embracing my calling as wife and mom in a deeper way, and relying 100% on the Lord for what I need to do that. I am sitting in a place where I can receive grace (meaning, I really know I need it). I am literally reveling in the Lord and smiling at the way He sees more, which leads to more worship, more intimacy, more strength, more joy. I can tell people are praying seriously for me, and I am so grateful. I’m seeing the Lord open a couple of doors for me to sing again, and the best part is, I know I can completely be myself and offer what small gift I have to offer and not look back wondering if I was good enough or deep enough or not too whatever. I had felt free in the past, but somehow in my serious issues with church/ministry I had lost that freedom. I am free again because the Lord is teaching me how unimportant I truly am in the whole thing…What a concept. It’s wonderful. I really can “just be.”
Hope to be back again to blog soon, because I have a couple things to write about…but we’ll see! Blessings-
